Thanksgiving is just around the corner and you realize that it is finally time to introduce your new girlfriend to your family. So naturally you invite her to Thanksgiving dinner. I mean there are issues with bringing home a partner in every relationship but sometimes with gay relationships as accepting as your family is they always have some ancient opinion that needs to be heard (thanks Grandma!) and you are going to want to prepare for it. In doing this you will ease everybody through the transition of a new girlfriend. So today I’ve compiled a list of three major points to cover when bringing your girlfriend to Thanksgiving for the first time.
The number one things you’re going to want to cover is physical appearance. This means you and her since you are in a lesbian relationship it’s like being sisters so you always share clothes and get ready together. All your clothes got mixed together in the U-haul anyway. The first thing your family is going to see when they answer the door is how your significant other looks. Make sure that you wear a pink dress, frilly preferably, and take a sufficient amount of time doing your hair. Bows are really femme, I always really liked bows. If your girlfriend has long hair make sure that she cuts it all off before she meets your family. Everybody knows Lesbians don’t have long hair and you don’t want your family to think she’s a fake. Having her chop her hair is also a test of how into you she really is.
The next step in appearance is her outfit. You might want to surprise her with something nice to wear. Perhaps a baggy flannel and slouchy hat ? The main point is making sure your family can clearly identify who the man is and who the woman is in the relationship. You want to set this confusion aside as soon as your mom answers the door. So that conversation of butch and femme can immediately be put to rest.
The next thing to cover is obviously food. Make sure that when your dinner is done you state that you refuse to eat meat. All lesbians are vegetarian and you don’t want there to be any confusion. Roll your eyes extensively when your mom asks if you want any turkey and go into a very detailed account of how turkeys are treated in the food industry. Ten points for Gryffindor will be awarded if you can bring up a PETA video on your smart phone. Also, remind your mother repeatedly how much you and your girlfriend love your cat and how you would never eat your cat. If you don’t have a cat, get a cat or you fake. Make sure your girlfriend makes the very popular vagitarian joke after she refuses her portion of turkey. Your family will thinks she’s hilarious. If she’s total vegan she is definitely a keeper. If your iron levels are running low just continuously ask for sushi. Everybody knows that lesbians are artists who thrive on the consumption of sushi.
The last point to cover is interaction with family. You may want to put on some Tegan and Sara music in the background to enhance the conversational setting Make sure that when any of your male cousins try to talk to you or your girlfriend that you ignore them. If they try and stray in again become unreasonably moody. Protect your girlfriend from having to converse with them by reminding your male cousins that lesbians hate men. When you’re done warning your male cousins about your girlfriend. Warn your female cousins so they are prepared as well. Let them know that your girlfriend is probably trying to hit on them. Lesbians will hit on every single girl. We’re only trying to recruit.
In all seriousness, a lesbian relationship is surrounded unfortunately by many archaic stereotypes. Make sure that your girlfriend is being herself and feels comfortable, whether she fits the stereotypes or not. You want your family to see the side of her you absolutely adore and the best way to let this side come out is by making her feel completely comfortable. Be there for her when grandpa starts asking questions or bringing up stereotypes. If you like her and she’s not some manipulative, crazy psycho on your mother’s radar. then your family will like her as well.
